Irony Alert: Zuck Wants Privacy Too


facebook_small.jpgADOTAS – Irony is a dish best served hot and tangy: Facebook CEO Mark Zuckerberg claims that the latest lawsuit against him and the social network is trying to unearth details of his private life only to harass him. So is that better or worse than unwittingly having it sold to advertisers because someone changed the default controls?

Paul Ceglia, who owns a wood pellet fuel company located in Wellsville, N.Y. and is not without his eccentricities, claims he has a paper that gives him 84% ownership of Facebook. Both Ceglia and Zuck are sketchy folks to say the least, so it’s hard to take a side in the impending lawsuit, which was recently moved to Federal Court.

However, Ceglia is trying to take the case back to New York State Court under the claim that both men are New Yorkers (which is kinda odd considering Zuckerberg has lived in California for a while now…). According to Seton Hall Law Professor Adam Steinman, defendants tend to fare better in Federal Court while plantiffs can sometimes have a “home-field advantage” in state court.

The get this: in a filing in Federal Court in Buffalo, N.Y., on Monday, Zuck’s lawyers claimed the plantiff “filed this remand motion to harass defendants under the pretext of obtaining jurisdictional discovery into Zuckerberg’s private life.”

Oh? Give us some juicy details! No, Zuck’s lawyers aren’t even hinting what might be at issue, and it ain’t clear what Ceglia is interested in either.

We know in the soon-to-be-released movie “The Social Network,” Napster cofounder Sean Parker (in the form of Justin Timberlake) snorts cocaine off of bare teenage breasts (which Facebook claims is fiction, though still pretty hot), but I can’t wait till Oct. 1 to see how dirty dirty dirty Zuck is! What drugs does he like to snort off of which body parts? My money is on crushed Adderall delicately perched on the elbows of geriatric men.

It’s hard not to chuckle at the guy you can’t block on Facebook fending off third parties trying to manipulate their way into his personal life. But perhaps we should have a tad bit of pity for Zuck, as his doppelganger is currently appearing on posters all over cities with the word “Punk” in large letters. OK, they also read “Genius” and “Billionaire” — the world’s smallest violin is finished playing the world’s shortest etude.

On another interesting “Social Network” note, while Facebook has declined to run ads for the movie on its network, its Facebook page has 15,000 Likes. The official website has 29,000 Likes. Not bad — still got a month before the debauchery. Snort it up, Parker!


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